FAIL

oh gosh.. i feel like a failure.. i fell for someone based on their looks and not for who they are. i don't know this person at all and yet, i fell for her because she is beautiful. 

the heart and mind are lost

What if it cant be done? yeah, no one said that it would be fun, but with all the fights and tears, what am i going to do with all my fears? this heart and mind are trying to find what it is they need and to find the lead. finding it but not falling because then i'll be lying on the floor balling. each one can only handle a certain amount but enough so that i can no longer count as strong as i am, i can break with a small 'bam' sometimes breaking down is needed because i think that He can't hear what i pleaded. as much as i know that that is a lie its enough to make this numb man cry this is all in my heart I'm letting it out because its tearing me apart my heart and mind are both naive all i can do is hope that soon, they will believe.

who?

i should learn from what i say

i should learn to sometimes obey

there were words that i once spoke

words that were to not be taken as a joke

i spoke them to a friend

they were strong so they could not bend

there is someone you need to find

someone who is not blind

someone who can see

that somone will fill you with glee

they wont run from you like a coward

they'll make you clean like you just showered

trust is the thing that gets in our way

its something words can not portray

you found someone whom you can tell

of all the places where you fell

there's a wall that stands in front of me

its so big that i can not see

who can i tell my heart to

without having to worry about them saying aduie

the choice

the hardest thing is right in front of me.

the hardest thing is finding out of that girl is 'she'.

the hardest thing is finding out if its true.

the hardest thing is fighting being blue.

when will i figure it out?

this confusion makes me want to shout.

there is only so much i can take

before the shell im in will break.

i've been at this road for far too long

and i've even listened to his song.

i cry when i hear the lyric

i need to be careful with what i pick.

Star Trek

sooo today i saw Star Trek. &&&& it exceeded my expectations. this was a great movie. The special effects, the way each character was used. I'm not good at analyzing movies in depth soooo this will be a bit choppy. I thought it was cool that they used the original Spak and how they did a future and present type thing. the beginning was suppppper sad. there were happy and sad parts throughout and a lot of action =] i like it =] it was wayy cooler than the old star trek episodes. 

this blog

now that I am going to start to blog, i need to keep it up. haha i dont want this to blow up and die. ahaha this new adventure will be an interesting road =]